Great Vibes (For Your Toes) • 11 December 2008

KS up in the Portland office clipped this from the current US Weekly. Looks like ad prices are going down. More of the same to come…?

YogaToes

I wonder what they will think of next. Maybe…

-Electro-stimulation sensors to hook up to your spine at night. Let it raise your kundalini for you, while you sleep!

-Driste training wheels: a headgear dangles a tiny photo of your favorite guru, right in front of your third eye. Like this (note correct crossing of the eyes). This product is extra aerodynamic to accommodate gymnastic versions of “spiritual” asana practice.

-Interactive chant DVD with mantra recitations by all your favorite teachers. Learn to imitate the idiosyncracies, weird pronunciations and even lisps of your guru of choice.

-Posturefarming: pay teenage practitioners in third world countries to “earn” ashtanga poses for you. Like this. Maybe even hire them to practice deep concentration or enter bliss consciousness on your behalf. Hey, everything is connected.

16 Comments